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Free — No Card. No Catch.

Every Number You Need To Grow Dispensary-Quality Bud At HomeWithout Killing Your First 3 Plants

A 2-page cheat sheet that replaces googling "why are my leaves yellow" at 2am.
Print it. Tape it to your tent. Stop guessing every feed.

PDF in your inbox in ~60 seconds. No spam.

🌱 You're in!

Your cheat sheet is right below — scroll down to see it. Right-click or long-press any page to save/print. We'll also send grow tips to your inbox.

50,000+ seeds shipped 80+ breeders 2,500+ grower pain points
What's on the sheet
Page 1 — The Numbers
Seedling temp72-78°F
Veg humidity55-65%
Flower VPD1.0-1.4
Soil pH6.3-6.5
Coco pH5.8-6.0
Peak flower EC1.6-2.2
Mixing order7 steps
Watering rules5 mediums
Page 2 — Quick Ref
Trichome guide5 stages
DLI targetsby stage
Pest quick ID7 pests
Deficiency ID9 issues
Training methods8 types
Drying targets60-65°F
Cure schedule4 phases
Emergency fixes6 protocols

Your Plants Are In Guess Mode

✕Googling "yellow cannabis leaves" for the 47th time
✕Adding more nutes when the real problem is pH
✕Watering on a schedule instead of reading the plant
✕No idea if your temp, humidity, or VPD are in range
✕Guessing harvest day — losing potency every 24 hours
✕Spending $200+ on bottles to fix a $15 pH meter problem
Here's what changes when every number is on two sheets of paper.

What You Get (For $0)

🌡️

Environment Targets — Every Stage

Seedling through cure. Temp, humidity, VPD, light. One glance = dialed or cooking.

Value: $27
🧪

pH & EC — Soil, Coco, Hydro

Exact sweet spots per medium. Prevents most "deficiency" problems before they start.

Value: $19
⚗️

Nutrient Mixing Order — 7 Steps

Wrong order = lockout = starving plants in a pool of food. This fixes it permanently.

Value: $15
🔬

Deficiency Quick ID — Symptom → Fix

9 common issues. What it looks like, what's wrong, what to do now. No more Reddit guessing.

Value: $29
🔍

Trichome Harvest Guide

Clear vs cloudy vs amber. Chop for energy or couch lock. The 3-5 day window most miss.

Value: $12
🐛

Pest ID + Dry & Cure Protocol

Mites, thrips, rot, PM — fast signs, first moves. Don't wreck the last 2 weeks.

Value: $22
Total value
$124+
You pay: $0

Free. 60 seconds. No card.

What Growers Say

★★★★★

"Killed my first 3 plants. pH was wrong the whole time. Page one saved grow #4."

JM
First grow · Reddit
★★★★★

"Taped it to my tent. Haven't Googled mid-feed once. Should ship with every seed order."

RK
Year 2 · Instagram
★★★★★

"The mixing order alone. Had no idea I was causing lockout. Plants exploded in a week."

DT
Coco · r/microgrowery

Why Free?

We're not a marketing company that sells seeds. We're growers who sell seeds.

A grower who knows what they're doing:

  • Wastes fewer runs
  • Buys better genetics
  • Comes back every season

72% of our orders are returning customers.

Making you better at growing is the best marketing we've ever done. No catch. No 47-email pitch. Just a sheet that works.

Questions

"What's the catch?"+
Email for a PDF. Few grow tips over 2 weeks. One-click unsubscribe. We sell seeds, not data.
"Total beginner?"+
Built for you. Every number, plain language. The sheet that makes everything else click.
"Growing for years. Too basic?"+
pH ranges, mixing order, harvest windows trip up veterans constantly. 2 pages beats 15 bookmarks.
"Can I print it?"+
PDF. 2 pages. Designed for your wall, not your downloads folder.

Still Scrolling?

6 months stitching together pH charts from 50 Reddit threads.
Or 2 pages. Right now. Free.

Free. Instant. No card. 50K+ seeds shipped. 80+ breeders. Not going anywhere.

Multiverse Beans — Premium seeds. 80+ breeders. Free seeds every order.